Aahhh...Valentine's Day...a day set aside to express your love to another person through gifts, cards, flowers, and chocolate. Or, as those of us who have been married a long time refer to it as ‘Thursday’.
There is a pressure on Valentine's Day to have the perfect dinner with the perfect date and give the perfect gift. The problem is that perfection isn't obtainable. The more we strive for it, the more we will be left wanting. Valentine's Day is the ideal time to talk to your teen moms about God's great love for them and how different it is from the 'fairy tale/romantic comedy love' they think they want. The sacrificial, all-consuming love our hearts are yearning for is found God alone.
Apart from God, our love would be about what we can get and how it makes me feel. It would be shallow, empty, and unsatisfying. The love God has shown us by sending his son, Jesus, to die on the cross for our sins is mindboggling and entirely initiated by Him because He IS love (1 John 4:16). We have done nothing to deserve his love; we can never be lovely or good enough to earn favor with God.
Please consider – as unpopular as this idea may be - it's essential to help your teen moms understand that God’s best for them may not include being married. Marriage shouldn't be idolized as the only way to find contentment and joy in life; true contentment and joy are found in Christ alone. Being married to a person who shares your faith in Jesus Christ and desires to put God first brings glory to God the Father. Your shared mission to be a light in the darkness does much to further God's kingdom. But binding yourself to someone who is not walking in the same direction and doesn't want to honor God is like strapping a ball and chain to your ankle. You can move forward, but the effort is significant, and the progress is slow.
Ephesians 2:4-5 states, "BUT GOD, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ - by GRACE you have been saved." For those of us who have put our faith and trust in the saving work of Jesus Christ, our highest aim is to love like him and glorify him. Because God has lavished his love on us, we want to lay down our wants, expectations, and selfish desires to honor him and benefit others.
Showing and speaking words of love can sweetly fill our hearts and minds, but it is temporary happiness. Sharing God's unconditional and abundant love shown to us through Jesus Christ brings lasting satisfaction and joy today and for eternity.
“A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.” John 13:34
Kristin served as Teen Mother Choices first Program Director in the 1990’s. In 2012, Kristin joined TMCI as our first Training Coach. In 2016, Kristin became TMCI’s Training Director.